Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Consequently, I've spent most of the day reflecting on the things I actually accomplished and the many things I wish I had accomplished this past twelve months...let's see, buy a dumperooni, check; get knocked up, check; stick with the 'ol bloggy, check; lose weight and get in shape, oops...well, something's gotta give.
Really, the only resolution I technically made with myself last year was to start a blog and post at least once a month. I am happy to report that I achieved my goal...to Chad's dismay...I am addicted.
Anyway, this year I have decided to really challenge myself by setting not only one, but several resolutions. I am hopeful, yet doubtful that I will accomplish them all, but still want to try.
Immediate goal... find myself a RED VELVET CUPCAKE.
Long term goals...to be more diligent about family home evening, prayer and scripture study. Second, to be better about budgeting...ugh, I hate that word. Third, to get back down to pre-babies size...methinks I will be enlisting my good friend Jenny, or W. Watchers for this one. Fourth, bearing in mind that this is the caboose baby, I would ideally like to have an extreme overhaul done on the 'ol body, a little nip here, a little tuck there, and a little lift everywhere. But, also bearing in mind that resolution number two is to stay on a budget...I'll have to achieve this the old-fashioned way...duct tape and super glue. Just kidding, I may actually have to break a sweat and exercise...ooh, I just vomited a little. Hopefully I will be able to overcome my aversion to movement.
Well, there it is, immortalized in cyberspace for all the see.
Here's to a happy, red velvety new year.
Friday, December 19, 2008
Note: I am not changing my theme song...Thank You...because I want to say "thank you" to all you big, fat butters who don't know how to wait your turn.
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Here's where the shout-out comes in. I am truly surprised by how concerned friends have been about our current situation. When old ward members found out we were still without a kitchen and no means of cooking, people were offering to bring in meals and were asking us over for dinner. I cannot tell you(and you know who you are) how grateful I am to for your friendship. I cannot tell you how guilty I feel as well, because I know that you all have had your fair share of hardships and I was not there for you like you have been for me. I hope you can forgive me. Please know that I will not forget this wonderful act of kindness and service. I cannot say thank you enough. And for the record, all the food has been FREAKIN' FANTASTIC.
Please know, that someday I will try to return the favor.
In addition to food, friends have offered babysitting and words of support. You will never understand how great it has made me feel to get a phone call, or text or email simply asking how things were going and if I needed anything.
In a nutshell...I am lucky...and you guys are DA BOMB. I love you all and hate the thought of not being able to see you guys around the neighborhood or every week at church. But then I am comforted by the thought that I know where each and every one of you live, and I will come track you down if you stop calling or texting me. So, consider yourselves warned.
Thanks again, everyone who has helped us. We owe you all...big time.
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Oh dear, red velvety, delight from my dreams...I cannot stop thinking of you. How I wish you were closer so I could admire your perfect reddish hue, and your creamy, white frosting cap. How I wish I could just hold you, smell you, lick you...and eventually devour you, with little or no regret. Hopefully, my dear cake of tangible love, it will not be much longer before we are reunited. Until then, know that you are in my thoughts...constantly.
Now, you may all understand why I have not posted pics of the house. I have much weightier(after I get done eatin' em) and tastier things on my mind.
Here's a pic of what I see when I close my eyes and night, and what I think about every other second of the day. Try not to cry. I know it's beautiful.
Friday, December 12, 2008
I included a few more clips becuase I just couldn't resist. This next clip cracks me up. I love it when he says "I pity the poor fool, who don't eat Mr. T cereal". I don't why it makes me laugh, but it does. I also like how eat imitates eating like his little dog Speck (this part cracks Beckham up too) and then how he makes this ridiculously complicated breakfast and then eats one little morsel of cereal.
I love how you can see P.W. go flipping off to the side after he crashes through the sign. Hee hee.
However, today is a better day, which is why I'm attempting to post. I am seeing a glow...ever so faintly...at the end of the long, ridiculously dark, tunnel that is remodeling (don't anyone tell me I told ya so...). Bedrooms are painted, the rest of the house is currently being painted and will hopefully be finished by Monday of next week. Then we have the counter people and flooring people coming next week to do their thang. Hopefully by next Friday we will have a semi-functioning household...hopefully.
I am not going to make any promises, cause I'm sick of lying at this beautiful time of year, but I may POSSIBLY get some pictures up on the housy blog...for those of who may be interested.
Oh, and mom and dad if you read this, we're okay. I know you haven't been able to reach me for over a month. But we're okay, we're alive. Everyone is well, except for the typical bowel issues that accompany a hellish diet of fast food and cold cereal. Aside from that all's well. Don't worry bout a thing.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
We finalized both the purchase of our "new" home and the sale of our "old" home, moved out of the "old" home and started demo-ing and remodeling the "new" one; which consequently has forced us into temporary homelessness. Thankfully we were able to find some good samaritans to take our brood in...my sister and her family. Methinks she might be regretting that decision now, but she and her family are to too kind to kick a pregnant lady and her four children out into the cold, so here we are, still mooching off the fam.
The past two weeks have been spent trying to get things finished on the house so that we can leave my sister and her family to the peace and serenity they once knew...so long ago. But, honestly I am not sure when the house will be done. Hopefully it will be done "enough" that we can start moving in this week, but I know better than to get my hopes up.
On a lighter, happier note, Chad and I went to the Coldplay concert last night. Again, I bided my time by watching fellow concert goers act like imbaciles. This concert experience boasted a middle aged, ice-cream licking, dancing man, a couple of scantilly clad hoochie ladies shakin' their assets, and another freaky, dancing lady off in la-la land. And like last time, I became the freaky, dancing, old lady when my boy Chris took to the stage and started singing.
In a nutshell, the concert was amazing. Coldplay is probably my favorite band and it was surreal to think that I was in the same room with them. They were cordial and gracious throughout the entire concert which makes me love them even more. I have spent the blessed sabbath walking in a Coldplay daze. Unfortantely it's back to the grind tomorrow.
I have left you with a few of my favorite coldplay songs...that are still ringing in my ears...literally.
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Anywho, at some point I did end up dozing off and was awoken by the blood curdling screams of my little man. It is never fun waking up to that sound and my heart nearly burst out my chesticle.
Sometime during my, uh-hum, brief moment of unconsciousness, my little guy decided to venture down to the basement where his elder siblings were...supposedly sleeping. Something tells me there was no sleeping going on, but rather the usual shenanigans that seem to plague our family.
By the time I had my wits about me, Avery had already climbed the two flight of stairs with her screaming brother in tow. She explained that Beckham had been playing, while they were all "resting" and had somehow fallen off the bed and hit his eye on the trundle. Uh huh, sure. She handed over her injured brother and promptly left...the sign of the guilty. When I was finally able to focus my weary eyes I was immediately drawn to Beckham's left eyebrow. It seriously looked like the boy had a mutant alien growing under his skin...it was ridiculous.
By morning the swelling had gone down, but had left a nasty purple bruise in its wake.
It has been a couple days since the incident took place, but it looks worse now than before. The bruising has moved down the side of his face along his temple, and is underneath his eye as well. Poor kid. He doesn't even know how pathetic he looks. I have made it a point not to venture out in public so as to avoid the dreaded "what happened" question. Even if it was an innocent little accident there are always those mother's who like to flash the "that would never happen to my child" glare, and in my volatile hormonal state I felt it best to avoid the confrontation...not sure why, but pregnancy seems to bring out my impatient and intolerant side.
I will try to upload a picture soon, that is if I can find my camera and the necessary cord (we're in the middle of moving...just in case you were wonderin').
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
No seriously, this post is for my kiddies, but read on if you like.
Today history has been made. Though I am a staunch republican and voted as such, I cannot help but feel a little proud of the history that has been made this day. Though I cannot profess to support everything president-elect Obama stands for, I do believe that all men are created equal...regardless of race, religion, etc. For that I believe this day is a victory for everyone.
Little ones, I know that you cannot fully understand the gravity of this situation, but it is something your children and grandchildren will read about in their history books.
The one thing I hope to impress upon you most is that this country is great. It was founded my great men who wanted it to be a home for people of all colors, races and creeds. It is truly the one place a person can become whatever they want, and can accomplish anything they set their mind to. I hope, my little kiddies, that you will always remember that.
Okay, now I'm off to bury all my gold and silver and secure the bunker...just in case.
P.S. Another proud moment for me today was seeing that proposition eight passed. The people have spoken...long live the family.
Sunday, November 2, 2008
Saturday, our family partook in the dreaded annual Brendle family photo shoot. For some reason the word picture brings out the very worst in my family. Every year I get my hopes up thinking that this will be the year; the year everyone decides to be a team player and will smile, smile, smile til' their little cheek muscles quiver with exhaustion. And every year I'm disappointed. This year was no exception. However, the photographer had a finger like a trigger-happy gun slinger...the fastest finger in the west...and was able to capture some pretty great moments. Thanks Amy.
In addition to our photo shoot, I have started feeling lousy and we have started packing up for the big move down the street. We have to be out of our current home by the tenth, which leave us this week to get everything done. Fingers crossed that the deal on our Fruitwood house goes through.
And finally, today, Sunday, is Beckham's birthday. I am grateful he is only two, and will not care that his day was really lame...just a couple presents and a crappy Wal-mart cake.
I am hoping that the remainder of the weekend involves, me, a bed and some peace and quiet. But, I'm not holding my breath on that one. And now, some pics...don't be surprised when you see one of them donning our annual Christmas card in a few weeks.
This pretty much encapsulates how the whole family feels about picture time.
My little man is another year older. It is hard to believe that two years ago today, I gave birth to an almost nine pound child...my uterus and bladder haven't been the same since.
The poor child began his existence nameless. For the first week of his life his daddy and I bounced names back and forth waiting for one to stick, but to no avail. Finally inspiration struck, in the form of Emily Dean, who suggested the name Beckham, and finally our baby boy was named...after a freakin' super uber hottie soccer player with a British accent...swoon, swoon. Uh-hum, where were we? Oh, and finally our baby boy had a name. I cannot imagine him being called anything else. Fittingly, the child has had an infatuation with balls of all sorts since birth. And yes, the poor child will play soccer. It seems a little sac-religious to have him play anything but.
It is difficult to imagine life without this fair-haired, blue-eyed angel boy. Granted, he doesn't always act like an angel, like when he hits, bites or block-clocks the kiddies in the nursery, but he does have plenty of tender moments, like when he climbs up on my lap and tells me "I love you much", or when he tells me "by you me", which translates to "come sit by me", or when he jumps on my head and "lick/kisses" me.
In a nutshell, life with Beckham has been joyful. I realize how quickly he'll grow up. Until then I will enjoy him for what he is...a pleasant, yet occasionally moody two year old boy, who loves cars, dinosaurs, and action figures. I look forward to at least a few more years of "I love you much's" and "by you me's" and "lick/kisses" and I'll be sure to savor each one, for I know that soon enough they will not be given as freely as they once were.
But, no matter how old and cool you get, little Beck's, I will always love you...I will always love you much.
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Sunday, October 26, 2008
I have finally posted pics of the ol' money sucker. Just think of the potential...that's what I keep telling myself.
Oh, one fun thing we did do this weekend was attend our ward trunk-or-treat and our good friends, the Memmott's, Halloween party. I love all of the fun Halloween festivities. I'm finding that the excessive sugar rush adds to my exhaustion, but all of that heavenly chocolate is totally worth it.
Pics from the trunk-or-treat. Not sure what happened to the camera. The last half of my pics came out all blurry. And since these are the only pics I have of the girls...
Black cat Avery.
My little "oda", as Beckham calls it, and Carter-wan-kenobi.
Saturday, October 18, 2008
1- Avery lost her very first baby tooth. I know it doesn't sound exciting, but I think she's the last one out of all her friends to lose a tooth. It was a momentous occasion for her. She was a little miffed this morning when she woke to zilch under her pillow (I had fallen asleep early last night and forgotten to "help" the tooth fairy). Lucky for her, mama's a sly little fox. While she and I were chatting about the dudder tooth fairy I very discreetly stuffed two dollars under her pillow and then suggested she check one more time. Such a tender moment; definately mother of the year material.
2- Had to utilize my own five hundred dollar tip and try to dislodge yet another plastic bead shoved up Beckham's nose hole. Thankfully, I was able to talk the ol' man into performing the deed. Worked like a charm. Found the "sticky" culprit stuck to Chad's cheek. Father of the year material?...I think so.
3- Already had someone come and look at the house and it isn't even on the market yet. A friend from the ward who just moved in mentioned that she had some friends in the market to buy. They stopped in for a few minutes today to check things out. I know better than to be optomistic at this point, but man, it sure would be nice to get the thing sold...even better without the use of realtors...cha-ching.
As much as I would like to hope that all the weekend excitement has been exhausted I still have three hours of church to attend; which means, you will most likely be able to check back tomorrow for the second installment of weekend update. Perhaps I should just start a weekly post entitled Sunday Shenanigans.
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Don't ask me how one accidentally posts breaking news like this without knowing about it. But, leave it to me to find a way. It appears "pregnancy brain" has struck again; extremely early on. I think my case is terminal.
Good thing were have a little extra room as it appears we will be needing it sooner than we thought.
And, thanks but no thanks. (I know what you are all thinking...if we need someone to sit us down and explain our birth control options. Surprisingly, this incident was planned...sort of. Don't worry I won't explain.
Monday, October 13, 2008
We have purchased a home, I use the term loosely...a better description would be hole, pit and/or dump, in Draper. However, this dump boasts 4700 square feet, which is a great improvement from our humble 2300. It also sits on more than half an acre, which means we can buy those chickens I have always wanted. You think I'm joking, but I'm not. Ever since I saw Martha do a segment on chickens, I have always wanted some of my own. So, anyone in the market for organic eggs...you know who to call.
Fortunately, the structure is sound, but is in major need of TLC...unfortunately love does not come cheap, at least in this situation.
I have decided to start a new blog, aptly entitled HOME-LY, which will follow our progress as we transform our dream home "from pig sty, to totally fly". Feel free to join us. And, if any of you intelligent and highly educated peeps have any recommendations for appliances, flooring, granite, sub-contractors...who's good, who to avoid, where the best prices are etc, please feel free to share. Any and all suggestions welcome.
Also, if you know anyone in the market for renting please refer them to us. We will have a two bed, one bath basement apartment, new kitchen, paint and carpet ready for occupancy, hopefully by mid November. If our Fruitwood home doesn't sell by December, well then, that home will be available to rent too.
Ta-ta for now. I'm off to obsess over drawer pulls.
Thursday, October 9, 2008
Thankfully I happen to be an expert in the field of nostril foreign objects. How did I become so? Allow me to share. When Carter was two and a half he shoved a piece of rubber bouncy ball up his nasal orifice. Due to it's awkward shape and smooth surface the rubber was virtually impossibe to remove with any household tool...i.e. tweezers, needle nose pliers. Not to mention that everytime I "went in" the rubber seemed to retreat further into the nasal passage. I finally resigned and took the kid to the E.R. Five hours and five hundred dollars later I left the ER, broke, tired, but enlightened.
Here's what I learned...my five hundred dollar tip; first, close off the unobstructed nostril with a finger, next cover the child's mouth with your own mouth, making sure to create a perfect seal, finally blow gently, yet firmly (as to not break the seal) into the child's mouth...and voila...out shoots the foreign body; creating a virtual "nasal geyser".
I am happy to report that little Beckham's nose hole is free and clear of any obstruction. Fortunately I was able to catch a perfectly timed sneeze which enabled me to avoid using the "mouth to mouth" technique. I simply held Beckham's mouth shut and the force from the sneeze blew the platic beads...all four of them...right on out.
While the forced projectile technique maybe slimy and a little nauseating it has "saved my bacon" more than once. Hopefully this little info nugget will be a helpful addition to your parenting arsenal as has been to mine.
And yes, I do believe this heroic act has brought me one, teeny, tiny step closer to the title Mother of the Year. The road is long and the destination distant, but hopefully someday I'll get there.
I really should be preparing my presentation for a stake primary meeting I have to attend tonight...but lets get real...I'd much rather be blogging about my fabulously ear-shattering experience at the Weezer concert Tuesday night.
The night couldn't have started out better...with kids at the sitter and a loaded sweet potater from TRH in my bellee. After gorging til the point of near purging, Chad and I along with our good friends the Memmott's headed off to the concert.
The first two acts were okay, but frankly, I found it more amusing to watch concert goers. I should not judge, I know, especially when I have probably been the source of others amusement, but I couldn't take my eyes off a certain girl who was...well, a freak honestly...but I mean that in the most non-judgemental and kindest way possible. It was like watching a train wreck; I couldn't take my eyes off her. She was seriously in la-la land...twirling and swirling and frolicking with delight.
Initially I thought it might be the booze a-talking, but then I noticed she was not sporting the yellow wristband of drunkeness. Anywho, to you freaky, dancing girl, wherever you may be, thank you for keeping me entertained.
Finally the headliners, my biz-oyz, Weezer took the stage...and then I became the freaky, dancing old lady. But I did not care. Mostly because everyone around me was too inebriated to notice.
The boyz were an amamzing live act. At one point they had a group of thirty-ish concert goers take the stage and play with them. They interacted with the crowd throughout the entire concert. It was really awesome. As you can tell, I am like a giddy school girl when it comes to my music.
All in all it was a great night, topped of with a near brawl with an intoxicated concert goer. Don't worry Mike, everybody knows you would have totally col' cocked home slice's block off. But I was all prepared to kick him in his man goods just in case you needed back up (must have been the post concert adrenaline talking).
And now I leave you with some of favorite Weezer songs for your listening pleasure. In order to recieve full concert effect please turn speakers up to full blast, then place ear over said speaker. For added effect have your children scream at the top of their lungs whilst staggering with a beer in hand. ENJOY.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
But, we are going to Cali. Chad just dropped this little bomb on me last night. I say it like it's a bad thing...it's not...I'm just not used to this kind of spontanaity. Those of you who know me at all know how I feel about flying (I loathe it), and how I feel about leaving the kiddies for extended lengths of time. I need time (like weeks or months) to come to grips with these things and Chad has only given me twenty-four hours to do that. Not to mention that in those twenty-four hours I have to get four children packed as well as myself, clean the house and run to the grocery store.
Shootballs! I have a lot to get done. Don't worry, this is just the storm before the calm. I always have a little freakout and then I'm ususally okay.
(Deep, relaxed breathing).
Let me start over. Chad and I are taking a little vacay to SoCal. Today is the last day of the quarter and needless to say, things have been a little stressful, crazy, tiring...
So, last night, Chad handed me a little note; the front of which read "Bon Voyage". My first thought, "are you sending me off to the institution or something"?
Second thought, "wait, are you going somewhere...are you leaving me"?
In my defense, it was late.
He gently opened the card for me as I continued to stare, bewildered, into his eyes.
The note inside read "Congratulations: You won a vacation".
Okay, wait, I'm still confused...again it's late.
The note continued, "Thanks for being the support these last few weeks and for putting up with my especially surly (who uses that word anymore?) attitude. You are amazing (ahh, shucks). I know the end of the quarter pushes are harder on you than they are on me. You deserve a vacation! And I can't bear to leave you!! Love Chad."
At that point I had become really confused.
Now, looking back, I realize what could have been a really amazing, romantic moment...like something out of the movies...where I stand up sobbing and plant the biggest, wettest kiss on my man. But instead I looked up at him with that same bewildered and confused look on my face.
"You're coming with me to my meetings in San Diego", he finally explained, defeated and frustrated.
"Oh", was all I could mutter as the clouds started to part and things became clearer to me. A pretty lame reaction, I know, but that's the way my neurotic mind works.
Naturally I immediatly started freaking out; wondering who in their right mind had constented to take all four of my cute, yet exhausting children (thank you Sebring's, our good friends who may no longer be our friends after this is all over. We owe you guys BIG TIME). I began taking inventory on all of the things I had to do before we left: shopping, cleaning, packing.
Thankfully I was able to go right to bed and sleep during what would have been the pinnacle of my freakout. The ol' man planned that one well.
I woke up this morning still in mild freakout mode...but doing better...mostly just nervous to board a flying death trap (anyone got a couple of extra Valium laying around).
Obviously I haven't gotten any packing or cleaning done this morning as I've been sitting here at the computer instead. Crap, saying that just gave me a freak surge.
Okay, gotta go, but before I do, I wasn't kidding about the Valium. And, I gotta give props to my man for trying to do something totally romantic and memorable. You're totally the best. Sorry for screwing everything up. I'll try not to be so clueless next time, hint hint.
Farewell fellow bloggers. I look forward to returning soon; hopefully more tan and better rested.
Sunday, September 28, 2008
I am disappointed to report that there has been another incident involving the primary presidency.
Nothing as dramatic as the last episode...no angry leaders outside in the hall waiting to pounce, no substitution and/or addition of unsavory words to primary songs, but an incident nonetheless.
Allow me to recount.
I was on my way down the hall to the primary room to return some unneeded manuals. Upon entering said primary room I was struck by an uneasy feeling, call it...mother's intuition.
It was the end of church and I hadn't been informed of any misdeed, so I immediatly shrugged the feeling off. I was kindly greeted by my fellow sister and thanked for returning the extra manuals. A bit of small chat insued and just as I was about to bid farewell she stopped me.
"Um, hey, there was a little problem today in primary".
All I could think of to say was, "oh really", in my most surprised voice...curse you mother's intuition.
"Yeah, I already talked to Chad about it, but I just wanted you to be aware. Carter was a little disruptive today during singing time".
I didn't respond, but I was thinking "so...what's the big deal"?
"I told him he needed to be quiet, and then he told me he didn't like me".
"Okay wait, hold the freakin' phone". I didn't say that aloud, but rather screamed it in my head; all the while trying to restrain myself from tearing out the primary door and down the hall in search of the guilty fruit of my loins.
I gained my composure and ever so calmly replied "thank you for making me aware", though I really didn't mean it.
"I told Carter that he doesn't have to like me, but that he does have to be quiet", she added.
At that point I was speechless...for a couple of reasons. One, I was embarrassed that a child...my child...would have the tenacity to speak that way to an adult. And secondly, I was so livid that all I wanted to do was find my child and ask what the *#^% he was thinking speaking to an adult that way. And not just any adult, but a woman I visit teach... AND, not only am I her visiting teacher but she is also the counselor over the nursery...of which I am leader...you see where I'm going. This is not a person I can avoid. AWKWARD.
Now I realize that I may be overreacting. Keep in mind that it is fast Sunday, the blood sugar is low...waaaaay too low to be messin' with me...I'm a freakin' frazzled, starving lady. Nevertheless, I was not pleased to be told that my child was sassin' off to my "superior".
I finally snapped out of my muted stupor and mumbled a quick "thanks" and ran out the door.
On a side note...yesterday, out of the blue, I challenged myself to be more patient with the kiddies I have tendency to flip out on occasion...shocker...but I was reminded of this fact whilst barreling down the hallway, pushing fellow ward members out of my way as I searched for the guilty party.
Thankfully, Carter knew better than to put himself in the line of fire, and had made himself scarce, thus allowing me the time I needed to calm down and remember the challenge I made with myself a mere twenty-four hours prior.
I want you all to know that I made good on my promise. I didn't grab him by the shoulders and shake him violently; demanding to know where he gets off talking to his leaders that way, as I would have liked. As a matter of fact I didn't do anything at all...except for shoot him a look that conveyed pretty much everything I wanted to say and do to him. I think it worked.
When we got home from church he walked in the house and put himself in timeout.
There will be a discussion, perhaps a family home evening centered around this topic But for the time being I think I'll let Carter sweat it out a bit. I may possibly shoot him a follow-up look just to let him know who's boss and that this thing is not over... it's not over 'til the fat lady sings...and frankly, today, this fat lady is just to darn tired and hungry to do any singing.
Monday, September 22, 2008
Why not just change the playlist, you may be wondering.
Well, because I am OCD and in order to change the playlist, I must change the post to go along with it. So here it goes. Random thoughts, because I don't have anything better to say and seriously need to change my playlist.
Top Ten Words I Utterly Despise
1- Utter (not so much when used in reference to speaking, but when used to describe a cow's milk vessel, which consequently brings me to...)
2- Teets (pardon me whilst I dry heave)
3- Sack (I prefer the word "bag"...in every useage possible)
4- Panties (they are called undies, or underwear, or skivies, or drawers, but never, ever panties)
5- Discharge (need I say more...now I shall pardon you whilst you all dry heave)
6- Mucous (ugh)
7- Skid (I dunno, it's just an ugly word)
8- Void (another ugly word, like nails on a chalkboard)
9- Colon (mostly because of it's function, but also because it sounds a lot like Cullen, and my dear Edward should never be paired with such a word)
10- Chunks (I despise chunks in all forms. I do not like it in Peanut Butter, or soup, or...vomit. Sorry, if that just made you all blow "chunks")
runner ups: diarrhea, spew, fester, puss and/or pustule, bunion, Funion and onion (just kidding on the last two. Got a little carried away. I happen to enjoy FUN-ions, and onions...I don't however, enjoy bunions) and finally the word mom (but only when it comes in the form of a yell, whine or combination of both) I could go on...but I will spare your stomachs.
Okay, next item of business.
Top Ten Words I Absulotively (absolutely+positively) Love
1- Butter or Butta (I'll take it in any way, shape or form)
2- Freakin' (for when you want to spice up the vernacular)
3- Dip (Dual purpose word...both a noun and a verb...and consequently one of my favorite actions)
4- Refund (Need I say more?)
5- Cream or Creamy (the essential ingredient to all things decadent...as in ice cream, whipped cream, cream cheese etc., also my favorite consistency as in soup and peanut butter)
6- Sweet (another dual purpose word, an exclamation and an adjective. I particularly like this word when it precedes potatoe and I happen to be at Texas Roll House)
7- Edward (Need I say more?)
8- Massage (I feel relaxed just saying it)
9- Laugh (A funny word for a FUN-ny thing)
10- Shiz (just an all around great flavor word...like salt...everythings better with a little shiz)
honorable mentions: giggle, bubble, cuddle, marshmallow, masticate (cause it sounds naughty even though it's not), sassy, preposterous, ditty, booty, bootylicious, kiester and ba-donk-adonk. The list goes on but I'll leave it at that.
Monday, September 15, 2008
Chad: "We're supposed to be going out of town next week".
Me: "Well, we may heading down to St. George for grandmas funeral instead".
Avery: "Which gramma we talkin' about? The one with the servant?"
Ummm, yes Avery. That's exactly the grandma we're talking about. The one that lives in the castle on the hill; with two really ugly, really mean daughters and one beatiful, young step-daughter she treats like a slave.
Where the heck did that come from? Is that what Avery thinks my grandmother's South American roomate is...a servant?
I can just picture Avery the next time we are at grandmas house, "Hey slave, fetch me my Pet Shops and Barbies". Too many Disney movies, methinks.
Maybe I should sit her down and let her watch Glory, or Roots or Amistad...you know, a real life, down and dirty flick about bondage and servitude.
Watcha think about slavery now, sista?
Okay, I shouldn't joke. Many people lost their lives over the issue of slavery. Apparently they don't teach early American history in kindi-garten, but perhaps they should start, what with all the glamorization of slavery and servitude promoted in todays cartoons (yes Disney, I am speaking to you).
Our children need to know that it is not okay to order anyone around; whether it be an old, grouchy, English clock; an amorous, French candlebra; or a younger, more beautiful step-sister.
I guess I know what our topic will be tonight for family home evening; seeing as how Avery already treats yours truly like her own personal servant. But can you blame her?
Shame on you, Disney, shame on you and your little crab too.
I just attended an amazing enrichment night. The topic was "Safety from the Storm"...how to protect ourselves and our families from the adversary. I document for selfish reasons. I wanted to put everything I remember down "in stone" so that I could refer to it. But, I am happy to share it with you, because the information shared was invaluable. May I just say, that I am probably one of the most paranoid people and I was a little nervous about going, but I am so glad. I feel very EMPOWERED.
First, we had a police chief (in the business for thirty-six years, and a temple worker) speak to us on how we can protect oursevles physically. He said that bad things happen, generally, to people who do dumb things. Meaning, people who don't take the care to lock doors and windows at home, who provoke people on the freeway, who don't lock their car doors etc. are more likely to be the victim. So, rule number one, be smart. He also said to not be so trusting of people. I have to admit that this kind of bothered me a little, but I have to agree. Most offenders of the law look like any one else on the street and you have to be careful. One interesting thing he said is to be aware of the way we walk/present ourselves. By this he meant, walk with confidence, be aware of your surroundings, look people in the eye. People who look like they might put up a fight are less likely to become a victim. Insightful, I thought. He also gave his full approval of cell phones... even for children. Shocking. My little guy has been begging for one, and now I may have a justification for getting him one. He said to be careful of how we dress. Skin attracts sexual predators. Oh, he also said to be a good witness. Meaning, if we see something questionable happening take good notes. License plate numbers are key. If something doesn't sit well with us, if our guts are telling us something is not right, we should rely on that, too. It's okay to report things that may or may not be a big deal. Our phone call may be the missing link in catching someone they've been looking for. Oh, he also asked what we would be willing to lose our life over. Naturally, in a room full of women, the response was our children (or family). This is probably the only valid reason for fighting our offender. It is not worth it to fight for our car, our purse or whatever else. Just give it to them.
Always keep you car doors locked while driving. Keep your blinds closed at night so that we aren't giving some sicko a free show. Don't let your predator ever take you to a second location, EVER. Fight with all you have. It's worth it to get shot in a public place where help is readily available than to be carted off to some remote location where no one will hear or see you.
Oh, just like we tell our kiddies, do not approach the cars of strangers, EVER. Make sure our kids know this too. Teach our kids not to open the door for strangers, even if we are home. And, we shouldn't open the door to strangers either. That is our greatest barrier protecting us from the outside. If you leave your kids home alone, it's better that they make noise, so that it appears like people are there.
I know there was more, but I can't think of anything right now. Oh, one last thing, if your car breaks down and someone stops to help, do not get out with them. Keep you doors locked and stay inside. If they tell you they can't fix the problem without your help, stick a dollar bill out the window and tell them to call a tow truck for you. But, don't ever get out of the car. (Thank goodness for triple A and cell phones). One more last thing, be aware that after 11:00 pm, you are dealing with a different breed of people. He said that this is the time of day when the "nightcrawlers" emerge. People who have been drugging all night are just waking up, people who've been on porno websites are just venturing out etc. So, if you have to go out afterhours, please keep this in mind. Knowledge is power. Yeah baby!!!
Okay, the second speaker took a less intense approach. He is a seminary teacher and he spoke to us on how we can protect ourselves spiritually. It's actually very easy and there are four things we can do. These four steps come straight from the first presidency.
One: Family Prayer. Preferably both morning and night. A good approach is to pick a time both morning and night and designate that as family prayer time. He shared a story of how when he was a teenager he would race home to make it by ten for prayer. And the rule was that the last person in the house kneeling would say the prayer. So, if he had a date in the car and she slowly sauntered in, she'd usually end up giving the prayer. He said that eventually his dates and friends picked up on this and that it would become a mad dash to the house.
Two: Family Home Evening. We hear it a lot, I know, but it must be important. We need to be having family home evening. He shared a really good idea about dedicating our homes. He encouraged everyone to do this, and explained how he took the scripture, I forget the exact reference, but I'll do some research, that talks about building a house of prayer, a house of fasting etc. He took each of these qualities and made a FHE out of it in preparation for their home dedication. After he finished with them, they held a family fast and everyone went to the store and picked our their most favorite food item. After the fast and dedication were over they had a huge feast. Fun. He added that this has become a family favorite and tradition every time they move.
Three: Scripture/Doctrine study. He said that every family should be reading the Book of Mormon together. And, when you finish reading it, start all over again. He and his family have read it seven times. It's okay to read other scripture, but do it in conjunction with the Book of Mormon. He reminded us of how Joseph Smith said it is the "most perfect book". For those of us with young kids who probably don't understand we should still read directly from the scriptures. Just try to explain as you go along. I forget what prophet it was, but he said that there is no question/problem; financial, social, emotional, vocational etc, that cannot be answered or resolved in the scriptures. Hmmmmm. The speaker also mentioned that if we are reading our scriptures we will notice a difference in our patience with our kids and families, we will notice our kids becoming more receptive and obedient to us, more peace overall. I need that!
Four: Wholesome family activites. I guess it's up to our discretion to decide what these are. One thought he did share is for the father's to give our childen blessings. Make it a tradtion every school year. Neil A. Maxwell said that a father's blessing is one of the few blessings, aside from a patriarchal blessing, that can be recorded and referred to. He strongly encouraged everyone in the room to get a father's blessing and to use it as a reference. I would imagine that anything that builds family unity would fall under this category, like family vacations and outings etc.
Anyway there it is, "Cliff's notes" version. Probably not as entertaining as the real deal, but...
Friday, September 12, 2008
I just arrived home from an exhausting morning of unnecessary shopping and needed a little sumthin sumthin to relax my aching tootsies. So, I decided to put the ol' feet up and "veg" on the couch for a moment whilst engaging in some online window shopping.
Being the ever involved mother that I am, I gave Beckham a cookie and set him in front of the T.V., or what I endearingly call the "learning box", to watch some Little Einsteins...cause I want him to grow up to be a genius.
Anywho, in all my intense online purusing my little man got up without my knowing and disappeared. Like any reasonable parent, I finished what I was doing, and then proceeded to search for the little darling.
I couldn't hear him downstairs but decided to look anyway...I am a very thorough parent...but he wasn't anywheres to be found.
Next, I proceeded to check the doors, all of which were securely shut.
At this point I'm feeling a little panicky, but nothing worthy of hyperventilation. So, I decided to go upstairs, since it was the only place left to look.
I checked the bathroom, Beckham's bedroom, my bedroom, my closet...pretty much everywhere and still no Beckham.
Now, I know your probably asking yourself, what kind of angel baby would put their poor mother through something so worrisome, so I'll tell you.
On the way back down the stairs, I decided to check the crib, just on a whim...and would you believe what I saw...my darling angel baby, sleeping ever so soundly. The little guy had put himself down for a nap.
Immediately I felt a flood of satisfaction and pride wash over my whole person. I mean, only really capable parents have babies that put themselves to bed, right.
It appears that these Little Einsteins sessions are already starting to pay off.
Thursday, September 11, 2008
For the last two years a major topic of conversation in our household has been whether to move or not to move. Unfortunately, Chad and I were both cut from the same indecisive mold when it comes to decision making; which is why we are still having the same discussion twenty-four months later and which is why I have called upon you for help.
We have been in our current home for five years. It was the perfect little, emphasis on the little, home for us then. But, times have changed. Things are becoming sigificantly cramped shall we say. Not an environment fitting for a self-proclaimed neat freak and clutter phobe. Our humble (2400 sqare feet) abode, I fear, is no longer able to accomodate our family of six.
And to complicate matters more, there has been talk of possibly adding one more to the mix, thus making the grand tally a nice round seven. This really freaks me out. I seriously can't imagine where I would stick one more person. We could convert the master closet into a "bedroom". But that would just be plain old "dub-ya tee" now wouldn't it?
The other, more practical, arrangement would be to stick Beckham with Carter, thus making the nursery available for occupancy. While this seems logical enough, it makes me a little nervous because Carter is in the basement and Beckham is just a baby and I...uh hum, I mean he, needs me to be close.
While the space issue is enough reason to move in my opinion, I feel it necessary to share the reasons why we shouldn't move just to be fair.
The first and most important reason being money. Naturally, we will be taking on more financially to upgrade. The question is whether or not the trade off is worth it.
Secondly, we are ridiculously close to every modern convenience: grocery stores, restaurants (Texas Roll House specifically), I-15, shopping i.e. Target and Wally's.
Thirdly, we will be leaving behind the best neighbors, neighborhood, ward etc. and I'm nervous that we won't be so lucky a second time.
In all honesty, I think this freaks me out more than the money. I hate to move to a nice, big, expensive home only to learn after the fact that we have Freaky Freakerson on one side Creepy Creeperson on the other. Likely not gonna happen, which I realize, but that's just how my mind works.
Now to you my trusted, fellow blogees, am I being impractical, worldly, selfish...?
Is wanting a bigger house really a bad thing? Part of me thinks yes; that I just be grateful to any home at all. But then, part of me also thinks no. There is nothing wrong with wanting something more...something better. It's good to be motivated; to have goals and aspriations, right?
You can see my dilemma. I am a perpetual fencesitter (as is Chad on this particular topic). So, please if you have any opinions, advice, or suggestions etc. please share. Don't worry, what you say will only affect the rest of my life...just kidding, but at the same time kinda not.
Monday, September 8, 2008
Getting older never really used to bother me, but this birthday was not one I was particularly looking forward to. I was, in fact, kinda dreading it.
I think my birthday phobia startly shortly after I turned thirty and officially had to bid farewell to my twenties. There's just something very...grown up about being thirty-something. And quite frankly, I don't want to be grown up. And as a side note, do any of you remember the T.V. series called Thirtysomething from the early nineties-ish? Well, I do. And you know what, it was a show about old people (at least that's what I thought back then). And ya wanna know something else? NOW I'M ONE OF THOSE OLD PEOPLE!!!
I know I should just relax and accept the fact that I am getting older, but it's difficult. Guess I'll just keep lathering my face in Retin-A and vitamin E oil and countless other sticky, stinky substances that might possibly preserve my youthful glow. Hopefully it won't all backfire on me.
Anyway, aside from the "little" preoccupation with getting older, my birthday was a great day.
Highlights included: a deliciously decadent sweet potatoe from Texas Roll House...my mouth is watering just thinking about all those perfectly toasted mini marshies, and all that melted cinnimon butter; my totally rad birthday presents...I know that probably sounds completely shallow, but they really are rad...pictures are below; and finally, all of the phone calls and visits from family and friends...you guys are da shizzle...I love you. You totally made a day I was dreading not so dreadful.
So, thank you...and long live Botox.
I wish for eternal youth and a lifetime supply of Retin-A.
Aren't these little guys sooo cute? They totally remind me of Nightmare Before Christmas.
And the whole village. The best part...they are made of cardboard and paper. So, I don't have to worry about the kids breaking them like everything else their busy little hands touch.
Ta-dum! The "pee-ehs duh re-zis-tahns" (spelled phonetically cause I don't know French). Chad bought me this beauty. I think it was his passive-agressive approach to kicking me out of the office. Apparently he's tired of me invading his space. Oh, well. Now I can blog from the comfort of the couch, bed or toilet. Just FYI, I don't plan on blogging from the pot, per se, but it's an option...ya know...should the need ever arise.
Sunday, September 7, 2008
Twilight Quiz by QuizRocket.com fun tests!
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|You scored as Simon, the Doctor|
Simon Tam, a former well-to-do young surgeon and bachelor extraordinaire.
Which Star Wars character would you be? (pics)
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|You scored as Leia Organa|
A princess who uses her political powers to help the rebel alliance. You are calm and cool no matter the situation and always willing to fight for your beliefs. Now if only you could get those cinnamon buns off your head.
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|Hermione You’re book smart, moral and cool under pressure. You love learning and showing others what you know. You’re way more mature than those around you, and you always seem to know what’s best.|
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Most Comprehensive X-Men Personality Quiz 2.0
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|You scored as Storm|
Storm is the seconday team leader of the X-Men. She has a peaceful personality but must be careful since her emotions control her powers. She loves gardening and is afaid of tight spaces. Powers: Control of the Weather
Chronicles of Narnia Quiz
|Which Friends character are you? |
Your Result: You are like Rachel
|You are like Joey|
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Which "Lost" character are you?
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|You scored as Claire|
You are Claire! By taking your palm readers advice and flying when your 8 months pregnant you end up on the island. You have cravings for peanut butter and feel safe around Charlie, despite your dreams of being kidnapped.
Grey's Anatomy, Which Character Are You?
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|You scored as George O'Malley|
You are the guy or girl next door, you are everybody's friend, you have no true enemies. You put your friends first and yourself last. You tend to hide your feelings, and avoid negative situations.
Which Lord of the Rings character are you most like?
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Arwen of Rivendell
Meriadoc Brandybuck (Merry)
Gandalf the Grey
Peregrin Took (Pippin)
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Eowyn of Rohan