Monday, February 23, 2009

Things I never thought I'd say as a parent.

I think we have all had those moments where we've stopped dead in our tracks and thought...did I just say that?
Funny, how as parents, we find oursevles saying things our parents used to say to us, that we swore we'd never say.
Funny, how we say things we should probably never ever say...or maybe that's just me.

Here's a top ten list of things I've said (quietly or aloud) that I never thought I'd say.

1- Do you need medication (something I recall my mom asking me)?

2- Keep it up and your sleeping in the garage (something I recall my dad saying).

3- If you want anymore brothers and sisters you better shape up (kinda mean, but it really gets 'em thinking, ya know).

4- Try that again and my hands gonna be talking to your heinie.


6- Your breath smells like really, poo.

7- Where were you raised...a freakin' barn?

8- Quit brushing your privates with that.

9- Quit playing with your're gonna break it.

10- Do that again and I'll staple your buns shut.

Nuturally there are plenty more to share, but that's for another post. Just curious, what are some crazy things you've said to your kids?


Malea said...

There are the old standby's my parents used to say that would drive me crazy, but I now repeat, like, "Use your problem solving skills" and "That is one of the privileges of being a parent". But, I have said a few of the same as you relating to all fecal matter and bodily function sounds. But, "Don't jump off of that building", "It's ok to duct tape his hands, but not his mouth", and "Go to sleep or else you will find a home where the buffalos roam, and the coyote's are hungry" are a few crazies that I never expected to come out of my mouth. The kids favorite parting remark at night is strangely, "Good work, sleep well, I'll most likely kill you in the morning"-taken from Princess Bride. A bit of an overshare, but what are friends for?

Anonymous said...

I ALWAYS enjoy reading your blog. Thanks for making me smile, yet again! Sure makes me miss hangin.

mandi said...

Holy crap Erika that is the funniest thing that I have ever read! Court, Alicia and I had an awesome time reading that...I also find myself saying "Do you need medication?" undoubtedly picked up from Alicia, but I seem to say it more to my hubby than to Ivie....

Ashlyn said...

I even recall my mom saying I need medication!

Michele Ashman Bell said...

Erika this is one of your best. I find myself wanting to know more about the situation behind the comment. I totally laughed out loud about stapling your buns shut. I can't imagine which child you said that to. Or was it Chad?

Kendyl Carol Bell said...

OMG I can totally picture those being said by anyone of the Ashman girls. hahahahah you are the best