Please Don't Report Me

Okay, so this is my attempt to persuade you all to forget about turning me in for mental/emotional abuse.
I know that some of the things I say sound harsh...and at times, downright appalling. But allow me to explain myself. Surely you will see my point.
My kids know me well enough to know that I would never drop them off at a gas station in a strage, unfamiliar, podunk town and just leave them there. I might drop them off and drive a few hundred feet, but I would eventually stop and let the hysterical child back in the vehicle. They know this...I've done it before.
And the whole adoption thing...come on, I wouldn't really ever adopt them out. Certainly they know this...I haven't done it yet. Besides they are all finally getting old enough to work...and let's face it, I need all the manual help I can get.
As for the whole peeing thing. You gotta understand, it was said out of safety really...for the whole family. As the only adult on this particular trip, I was not comfortable pulling the car off to the side of the freeway and accompanying a bladder saturated child outside whilst he/she relieved him/herself. Surely one of the unattended dears would hop out the opposite door and try to run across the freeway, only to end up like the mangled skunk we'd passed five miles previous. And how would I explain that one to the old man? So, "just pee your pants", you see, is not me being mean or irritated...rather, it is me being a good mom.
So there you have it. Now, I'm sure you totally understand. My kids are fine...they will be fine. They totally get me. So, will you please, please, please forget about reporting me. It's all good.

More Things I Never Thought I'd say As A Parent.

Okay, just a few more things I heard come out of my mouth in recent days. Mind you, most of these things came out whilst driving with the kiddies to and from St. George...ALONE! That should be justification enough, right?


1- Are you familiar with the term adoption?

2- The next kid to make a peep gets dropped off in Scipio. (FYI, my father's family hails from this sleepy town. I'm sure the little dear(s) would have run into a relative sooner or later).

3- We are never taking another trip...EVER!

4- Just pee your pants.

Baby Update

About a month ago at my 20 week ultrasound the doctor saw something that he deemed slightly abnormal. He said that he thought that the babe's cardiac arteries appeared enlarged. Not much more was said as Chad and I weren't prepared for those results and didn't really have any questions.
We scheduled an appointment with a pediatric cardiologist at PCMC and spent the next four weeks wondering whether or not to be worried. I must admit that deep down both Chad and I felt like everything was okay, but still there was always a little bit of doubt and concern in the back of our minds.
Today was our appointment...our fetal echocardiogram. The ultrasound tech spent a good hour or so scanning the heart and taking billions of pictures...all of which looked like black and white blobs to me. After she finished we waited for the doctor to come in and give us the results. Another tense five minutes.
Finally, the doctor knocked on the door, and at first glance appeared happy and relaxed...a good sign. Turns out my intuition was right. He informed us that the ultrasound did not show anything abnormal and that everything looked just fine.
Funny how you don't know how worried you are until you find out that you have nothing to be worried about.
Chad and I were relieved.
Turns out that the pictures were so good that the doctor asked if he could use them for a reasearch project he was working on. So...my babies heart is, like, totally gonna be famous. In my proud state, I forgot to ask if using pics of my beautiful fetus meant our appointment was free.
The research project is for the development of software that will allow OB's to enter information collected from an ultrasound into a computer, which would then be able to evaluate it to decide whether or not the findings are, in fact, abnomal.
Pretty cool if you ask me.
I am so relieved that we were blessed with happy news. For a few weeks there, I did find myself wondering what life would be like with a sick baby. I realize that there are people out there who, sadly, aren't as lucky as we are to get such news. This thought was reinforced by the sight of all the little babies and children I saw wearing masks and being pulled around in wagons while waiting to see the doctor.
Not to be pushy, but be thankful for your health and your children's. Life and health are so fragile.